Big Number on Campus

Computer glitches are a pain, but they can be especially embarrassing when
they strike an American institution of higher learning. Consider the
following form letter from Arizona State University, in which a prospective
student's Social Security number was inadvertently substituted for his name.

The university says only a handful of such faulty letters were mailed --
out of thousands sent out recently by the college's parents association --
and the glitch has been corrected.

One was enough, though, as the father's cheeky response below attests. All
the Social Security numbers have been fictionalized.

-- By TOM KUNTZ
 
 

TO THE PARENT OR GUARDIAN OF TRUMAN BRADLEY
 

BOULDER CO 80303
 
 

Dear Parent or Guardian:
 

Congratulations on 987-65-4321's admission to Arizona State University! We
commend you for the significant role that you have played in helping him to
prepare for this exciting and critically important time. A.S.U. is
committed to providing an outstanding collegiate experience, and we are
pleased that he has chosen to take advantage of this tremendous
opportunity. We are fully prepared to assist 987-65-4321 in making a
successful transition from high school to college.

We also recognize that even though your relationship with 987-65-4321 may
change in the next few years, the importance of that relationship will not
diminish. At Arizona State University, we value your continued
participation in his academic, social and personal development and actively
seek your support in that endeavor. Whether through involvement in the
A.S.U. Parents Association, attendance at numerous events for A.S.U.
parents, or the occasional visit to campus, you will be a partner with the
university in encouraging 987-65-4321 to succeed.

We look forward to seeing you at an orientation program and during A.S.U.
Welcome Week prior to the start of the fall semester. Information about
these programs has been mailed to 987-65-4321. Many of the activities
during both events are designed specifically for you. In the meantime,
contact the A.S.U. Parent Programs office . . . if you have any questions
or concerns.
 

Sincerely,

Barbara A. Olson,
President, A.S.U. Parents Association
 

Laura M. Burgis,
Assistant Director, Parent Programs
 
 

The father's reply:
 

Dear Ms. Olson:
 

Thank you for offering our son, 987-65-4321, or as we affectionately refer
to him around the house -- 987 -- a position in the A.S.U. class of 2003.
His mother, 123-45-6MOM and I are very happy that such a prestigious
institution of higher education such as A.S.U. has extended this offer.

In selecting a college for 987, we are looking for a place that will
prepare him for the technological challenges of the 21st century. We seek a
college in which he can learn to master computers and learn to communicate
with clarity and sensitivity. I can only imagine the competence with which
you will, as your letter puts it so well, "assist 987-65-4321 in making a
successful transition from high school to college."

We will miss 987 when he goes off to school, and are very interested in a
college in which he will receive personal attention. I was particularly
touched by your sentence in which you note that our "relationship with
987-65-4321 may change in the next few years." This is certainly true.
Already we are beginning to focus as well on his brother, 123-45-6BRO.

I look forward to additional communications from your office. You manage to
convey more in your letters that any other college we have seen thus far.
And believe me, we are still looking.
 

Sincerely,
 

123-45-6DAD

A.k.a. Jeff Bradley
 
 

[Jeff Bradley and 987-65-4321 are still waiting to hear from Harvard, Yale
and Dartmouth.]