Dear Santa,
 
 You must be surprised that I'm writing you today,
 the 26th of December.  Well, I would very much
 like to clear up  certain things that have occurred since the
 beginning of the month!
 (While filled with illusion I wrote you this
 letter) I asked for a bicycle, an electric train set,a pair of roller
 blades, and a football uniform.  I destroyed my brain studying the whole
 year!  Not only was I the first in my class,
 but I had thebest grades in the whole school.  I'm
 not going to lie to you Santa, there was no   one in my
 entire neighborhood that behaved better than me.
 With my parents, my brothers, my friends and with my
 neighbors, I would go on errands and even help the elderly cross the
 street. There was virtually nothing I wouldn't do for humanity!
 
    WHAT BALLS YOU HAVE LEAVING ME A FUCKING
 YO-YO, A STUPID ASS WHISTLE,   AND A PAIR
    OF SOCKS!  WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING,
 YOU FAT SON OF A BITCH,  THAT   YOU'VE
    TAKEN ME FOR A SUCKER THE WHOLE FUCKING
 YEAR, TO COME OUT WITH SOME  SHIT   LIKE
    THIS UNDER THE DAMN TREE.  AS IF YOU HADN'T
 FUCKED ME ENOUGH, YOU GAVE   THAT
    LITTLE SHITHEAD ACROSS THE STREET SO MANY
 FUCKING TOYS, THAT HE CAN'T   EVEN WALK
    INTO HIS DAMN HOUSE!
 
   PLEASE DON'T LET ME SEE YOU TRYING TO FIT YOUR
 BIG FAT ASS DOWN MY
    CHIMNEY NEXT YEAR!  "I'LL FUCK YOU UP!"
 I'LL THROW ROCKS AT THOSE   STUPID ASS
    REINDEERS OF YOURS, AND SCARE THEM THE FUCK
 AWAY, SO YOU'LL HAVE TO  WALK   YOUR
    BIG FAT ASS BACK TO THE NORTHPOLE, JUST LIKE
 I HAVE TO DO SINCE YOU   DIDN'T GET
    ME THAT FUCKING BIKE, YOU PUNK BITCH!!
 
    YOU KNOW WHAT SANTA, FUCK YOU!!  NEXT YEAR
 YOU'LL FIND OUT HOW BAD
    I CAN REALLY FUCKING BE...YOU'VE BEEN
 SLEEPING ON A MOTHERFUCKER FAR  TOO   LONG!
    SO WATCH YOUR BACK NEXT YEAR, YOU FAT BITCH!
 
    Sincerely,
 
 
    Johnny