Darwin Awards:
Once again it is time to start thinking about casting your vote for the
1998 Darwin Award winner!  As you may already know, the Darwin Awards are
for those nominees who contribute to the gene pool by dying in
spectacularly stupid ways before they breed (thankfully). For those of you
who have not been following along each month the 1998 nominees are:

NOMINEE No. 1
[San Jose Mercury News]
An unidentified man,using a shotgun like a club to break a former
girlfriend's windshield, accidentally shot himself to death when the gun
discharged, blowing a hole in his gut.

NOMINEE No. 2
[Kalamazoo Gazette]
James Burns, 34, (a mechanic) of Alamo Mich., was killed in March as he was
trying to repair what police described as a "farm-type truck."  Burns got a
friend to drive the truck on a highway while Burns hung underneath so that
he could ascertain the source of a troubling noise.  Burns' clothes caught
on something, however, and the other man found Burns "wrapped in the drive
shaft."

NOMINEE No. 3
[Hickory Daily Record] Ken Charles Barker, 47, accidentally shot himself in
December in Newton, NC, when, awakening to the sound of a ringing telephone
beside his bed, he reached for the phone but grabbed instead a Smith &
Wesson. 38 Special, which discharged when he drew it to his ear.

NOMINEE No. 4
[UPI, Toronto]
Police said a lawyer demonstrating the safety of windows in a downtown
Toronto skyscraper crashed through a pane with his shoulder and plunged 24
floors to his death.  A police spokesman said Garry Hoy, 39-years of age,
fell into the courtyard of the Toronto Dominion Bank Tower early Friday
evening as he was explaining the strength of the building's windows to
visiting law students. Hoy previously had conducted demonstrations of
window strength according to police reports.  Peter Lawyers, managing
partner of the firmGolden Day Wilson, told the Toronto Sun newspaper that
Hoy was "one of the best and brightest" members of the 200-man association.

NOMINEE No. 5
[Bloomburg News Service]
A terrible diet and room with no ventilation are being blamed for the death
of a man who was killed by his own gas.  There was no mark on his body but
an autopsy showed large amounts of methane gas in his system.  His diet had
consisted primarily of beans and cabbage (and a couple of other things).
It was just the right combination of foods.  It appears that the man died
in his sleep from breathing the poisonous cloud that was hanging over his
bed.  Had he been outside or had his windows been opened, it wouldn't have
been fatal. But the man was shut up in his near airtight bedroom. According
to the article, "He was a big man with a huge capacity for creating "this
deadly gas."  Three of the rescuers got sick and one was hospitalized.

AND FINALLY, NOMINEE No. 6!!!
[Arkansas Democrat Gazette]
Two local men were seriously injured when their pick-up truck left the road
and struck a tree near Cotton Patch on State Highway 38 early Monday
morning. Woodruff County deputy Dovey Snyder reported the accident shortly
after midnight Monday.  Thurston Poole, 33, of Des Arc and Billy Ray
Wallis, 38, of Little Rock are listed in serious condition at Baptist
Medical Center.  The accident occurred as the two men were returning to Des
Arc after a frog gigging trip.  On an overcast Sunday night, Poole's
pick-up truck headlights malfunctioned. The two men concluded that the
headlight fuse on the older model truck had burned out.  As a a replacement
fuse was not available, Wallis noticed that the .22 caliber bullet from his
pistol fit perfectly into the fuse box next to the steering wheel column.
Upon inserting the bullet, the headlights again began to operate properly
and the two men proceeded on east-bound toward the White River bridge.
After traveling approximately twenty miles and just before crossing the
river, the bullet apparently overheated, discharged and struck Poole in the
right testicle.  The vehicle swerved sharply to the right exiting the
pavement and striking a tree.  Poole suffered only minor cuts and abrasions
from the accident, but will require surgery to repair the other wound.
Wallis sustained a broken clavicle and was treated and released.  "Thank
God we weren't on that bridge when Thurston shot his _____ off or we might
both be dead" stated Wallis. "I've been a trooper for ten years in this
part of the world, but this is a first for me.  I can't believe that those
two would admit how this accident happened", said Snyder.  Upon being
notified of the wreck, Lavinia, Poole's wife asked how many frogs the boys
had caught and did anyone get them from the truck.