The Ultimate Computer



The Ultimate Computer stood at the end of the
Ultimate Computer Company's production line,
at which point the guided tour eventually arrived.

The salesman stepped forward to give his prepared demo.
"This", he said, "is the Ultimate Computer. It will give
an intelligent answer to any question you may care to ask it."

A smartass who ran a humor mailing list stepped forward
and asked, "Where is my father?"

There was the soft hum of powerful electronic gear going to
the task. Panel lights lit and blinked, and within a couple
of seconds the laser printer printed out a piece of paper:
"Fishing off Florida."

The smartass laughed, "Actually, my father is dead! It was a
trick question."

The salesman, quickly thinking on his feet, replied that
he was sorry the answer was unsatisfactory, but as the
Ultimate Computer was precise, perhaps a rewording of the
question might work better.

The smartass said to the Ultimate Computer,
"Where is my mother's husband?"

Again, the hum of the powerful electronic brain filled the room.
After a moment, the laser printer whirred to life. The paper said:
"Dead. But your father is still fishing off Florida."