Supreme Sacrifice

Once upon a time there lived a woman who had a maddening
passion for baked beans. She loved them but unfortunately they had always
had a very embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction to her.
Then one day she met a guy and fell in love. When it became apparent
that they would marry she thought to herself, "He is such a
sweet and gentle man, he would never go for this carrying on." So she
made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans.
Some months later her car broke down on the way home from
work. Since she lived in the country she called her husband and told
him that she would be late because she had to walk home. On her way she
passed a small diner. And the odor of the baked beans was more than
she could stand.
Since she still had miles to walk, she figured that she would
walk off any ill effects by the time she reached home. So, she stopped at
the diner
and before she knew it, she had consumed three large orders of baked beans.
All the way home she tooted and putt-putted.
And upon arriving home She felt reasonably sure
she could control it. Her husband seemed excited to see her and exclaimed
delightedly, "Darling, I have a surprise for dinner tonight." He then
blindfolded
her and led her to her chair at the table. She seated herself and just
as he was about to remove the blindfold from his wife, the telephone
rang. He made her promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned. He
then
went to answer the phone.
The baked beans she had consumed were still affecting her
and the pressure was becoming almost unbearable, so while her husband
was out of the room she seized the opportunity, shifted her weight
to one leg and let it go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a
fertilizer truck
running over a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill. She took her napkin and
fanned the air around her vigorously.
Then, she shifted to the other cheek and ripped three more, which
reminded her of cabbage cooking. Keeping her ears tuned to the conversation
in the other room, she went on like this for another ten minutes. When the
phone
farewells signaled the end of her freedom, she fanned
the air a few more times with her napkin, placed it on her lap and folded
her hands upon it,
smiling contentedly to herself. She was the picture of innocence when her
husband returned. Apologizing for taking so long, he asked her if she
peeked, and she assured him that She had
not.


At this point, he removed the blindfold, and there was her
surprise!!! (SCROLL DOWN PLEASE)

























There were twelve dinner guests seated around the table to wish
her a Happy Birthday!!!...staring at her.